


For Mary Jane Watson, Press Play

by theparkerluck



Category: Spider-Man (Comicverse), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Engagement, F/M, Gen, Love, Marriage Proposal, One Shot, Romance, True Love, Voicemail
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:28:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25625194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theparkerluck/pseuds/theparkerluck
Summary: Peter records a message for MJ to find when she gets back.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Mary Jane Watson, Peter Parker/Mary Jane Watson
Comments: 3
Kudos: 27





	For Mary Jane Watson, Press Play

*click* Hi. Hello, um… Am I doing this right? I’ve never used one of these before. The light’s flashing at me, that means I’m recording, right? Jeez, why am I even using this? I guess I thought it would be more personal than leaving you a voicemail or something like that. Easier than doing it in person. I didn’t show you, but I picked it up when we were packing up your old house the other day. Wow. What a weird thing. I lived next to me ever since my parents died. We didn’t really know it then, but we were growing up together. That’s where it all started, huh. For me, the blind date. For you, the first time you saw me crawling out the attic window. (beat) I still can’t believe that you knew for so long. Of course you did. You’re Mary Jane Watson, keeper of secrets, and somehow, you’ve always seemed to know more about me than I know about myself.

Jeez, this is scarier than I thought it would be. My heart’s going like a thousand miles an hour right now. I guess I should just… get on with it I guess. I haven’t been… um, I don’t know, I guess I haven’t been thinking straight these past few days. *thump* Sorry, I was on the ceiling. Pacing. Yeah, that bad. I’ve been falling all over the place. Literally. Like the other day. I totally dropped the ball with Vulture the other day. Vulture! He’s… he’s not even that bad! And I had him, we were up in the air and he shook me off and when I shot my web I just completely missed him. I never miss, you know that. I barely caught myself before I broke my back on some upper east side condos. God, that was on the news, too, wasn’t it. I don’t know if you saw it, but it was pretty bad. They probably don’t get American news channels in Paris, or Milan, or wherever you are by now. Not that I would know. For all my adventures, I barely seem to make it out of Manhattan. (beat) I wish you were here right now. The apartment feels so big without you. The bed feels so big.

MJ, I… I’ve been wanting to ask you for so long. Eleven months ago. Right before we broke up. I had the ring and everything, and it was that night, that night when I waited at your place for so long the sun set and came back up again and you didn’t come home. I forget what this life can cost. I can deal with the crazed maniacs with metal arms and bags of explosives hitting me, kidnapping me, trying to kill me, but I mean, you, MJ… I kept waiting, telling myself you were at a party with the modeling studio, or visiting Anna and May, or god, off with an old boyfriend, anything else, because the thought that somewhere, you needed me, you were in danger because of me, and I wasn’t there… I’ve been beaten, tortured, shot for god’s sake, but shit, nothing, nothing, could ever hurt like that.

I was lucky you weren’t hurt. That it wasn’t one of my worse enemies, because believe me, any one of them would’ve done a lot more than hurt you. So lucky. A week later, when I was moving out of your apartment, you asked me why I ended it. I couldn’t explain that to you, MJ. I still can’t explain it now, not fully. The next three months were so hard without you. I dropped out of school, Aunt May got sick again, Felica came back. Honest, I almost hung up the webs for good. But I, uh… I never sold the ring though. It’s stayed in the box, in my nightstand drawer next to my old microscope. I moved it when I moved back in with you. Every night I’ve slept with it a foot left of my head. Every so often, I’d take it out. Fiddle with the box, or run my thumb over the stone. 

I don’t know if you remember this. It was the day after my parent’s funeral, and I was moving my boxes into Ben and May’s. Ben offered to carry the box with all my books in it. I insisted, and naturally, when I tripped and went splattering onto the sidewalk, I looked up and you were on your front step. Your dad was yelling so loud even I was scared, but you were just sitting there, sweaty and red-faced in your Goodwill shorts and tank top with that look on your face, that one you still get when your mind is a million miles away from your body. You looked over at me, this scrawny sad little kid in glasses, and you gave me a smile. What, with the funeral, I think that was the first smile I’d seen in days. It’s such a… it’s such a small moment, you’d never have given it a second thought, but I remembered that smile. And I don’t know, MJ, maybe that’s why I could never let go of you, even though for a while there, I really wished I could. Everything you do, every little kiss and smile just… it makes me fall so in love I can barely believe it. Over and over and over again. You know I don’t believe in soulmates, but goddamnit MJ, this has to be the closest anyone can get. I’m still scared of hurting you. Terrified. I dream about it sometimes, I don’t remember the dreams, but when I wake up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night with your name curled in a scream in the back of my throat, my hand always shoots to yours. I wake you up, and when your sleepy eyes fall on mine you squeeze my hand and smile like you’re in the safest place in the world. I love you, MJ, I love your eyes when you tell a bad joke and the way you call me tiger, I love your hands when you place them on my cheeks and the way you bite your cheek when someone mentions Spider-Man. I love you more than I thought it was possible to love anyone. More than life. More than anything.

Fuck it, Mary Jane Watson, I wanna marry you. I wanna marry you so bad it hurts. I want you to be mine, not just now, but forever and ever and ever and beyond that because nothing, nothing. Could ever make me stop loving you. So um. There it is. I’m not gonna be afraid anymore. As long as you’re here, I have no reason to be. I’m gonna leave this here for when you get back. I’ll wait on the front step of your old house. And if you… if you wanna join me… you know where to find me. Please find me, Mary Jane. *click*

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to thank Betty and Savior Complex for making me cry while writing this <3 they're doing the real emotional heavy lifting here


End file.
